A bit of trivia to start off with: I borrowed this movie from the library, and both the box and the DVD label had the title as “Zack And Miri.”  Meanwhile, books like “Fifty Shades of Grey” are available, but the library doesn’t want to get a copy with the full title of “Zack And Miri Make A Porno?”   Get off your damn, high horse.

Yes, this movie is gross, filthy, outrageous, vulgar, hilarious; but it’s also…sweet.  Writer/Director Kevin Smith has created one of those rare, crude, funny movies that is really a touching, romantic movie.  It’s like a big, brawny, foul-mouthed construction worker who, underneath it tall, is a loving, loyal husband and father who always puts his family above everything else in his life.  “Zack And Miri Make A Porno” has Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks as best friends and roommates who decide to make a pornographic movie in order to make the cash they desperately need to pay off their bills.  They make a pact that the sex is just business, and it won’t affect their friendship; but we all know that sex always brings complications.  This is true in life, and it is true in this movie.

One of my memorable, movie moments of “Zack And Miri…” is the montage of the cast and crew of the porn flick as they try on their costumes for the planned “Star Wars” themed porn movie.  The light sabers are huge, brightly colored dildos!

Another memorable, movie moment is the scene when a black, coffee shop worker played by Craig Robinson is asked by his boss to work on Black Friday.  Robinson responds with something like “You want me to work on Nigger Tuesday, too?”  This is one of the many scenes that had me stifling a laugh in order not to wake up my relatives at 2 in the morning!

Second runner-up in the memorable, movie moment category of this title is the scene when Miri’s High School and current crush, played by Brandon Routh, turns out to be gay.  This is most interesting as I’ve heard rumors that Routh is gay; so I’m wondering if Smith used those rumors to create this scene.

The award for the most memorable, movie moment of “Zack and Miri Make A Porno” is the scene when the cameraman of Rogen’s and Banks’ porno movie is lying down below two porn stars, videotaping a man having anal sex with a woman who is constipated.  Rogen rushes out of the room in a hurry due to a fight he just had with Banks, and slams the door.  The noise upsets the porn stars, making the man pull out too soon; and large amounts of feces falls on the face of the cameraman!  I freeze-framed the shot and saw corn among the feces!  It’s a crude, disgusting, simple, but highly effective joke that had me laughing for half a minute!

Fans of Kevin Smith shouldn’t miss this gem of a movie.  And if you do watch it, don’t watch it on regular cable tv — censorship and this movie do not play well together.

As for real pornos: guys, don’t you hate it when you’re masturbating and then they show the guy’s face?  In the old days when VHS was king, you would have to fumble with the remote and fast forward to when they show the woman again; but what sometimes happens is that you go far too forward, and by the time you hit the “play” button, the guy’s face is shown again!  But now, thanks to DVD and Blu-ray, we can choose a sequence of a porno flick and put it on a loop so we’ll know exactly what to expect as we take care of business.  Ain’t technology grand?

Hey, did I ever tell you I wanted to make porn movies many years ago?  It’s even easier now, as I have a high-end camcorder and microphone that I bought to make my indie flick years ago; plus I have experience setting up shots, editing, screenwriting, casting, etc.  Making a porn flick is relatively easy.  It’s the marketing and distribution I am unfamiliar with.  Eh, maybe one day I’ll put real time and energy into researching the information I need for marketing and distribution of adult movies.  That’s me, always reaching for the stars!

M

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